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  1. #29
    Administrator UncaRastus's Avatar
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    Deception? Say it ain't so!

    Back in the good old days, during the Vietnam Conflict, they sure never would have been deceitful!


    'We need a report that will keep the American People supporting our Conflictors in Vietnam. Here is an easy to use model for such reports to the POTUS.

    Anyone going over there, from the US Government, to report about how ___________________ (fill in the blank with Ngô Đình Diệm, maybe Dương Văn Minh, possibly Nguyễn Thành, could be Nguyễn Văn Thiệu , or Nguyễn Cao Kỳ, and just maybe Trần Văn Hương, or make up a name, but make sure that it sounds oriental, because really, who is going to find out that we are prevaricating) is spending all of the support money from the USA to defeat the Conflictees, make sure that you don't say anything about corruption of the Southern Vietnamese Government.

    There are a lot of Nguyễns mentioned. So many.

    Pronounce that name as Nugent, without the T. Just like that Amboy Dukes lead singer, Teddy Nugent. Without the Teddy or the following bunch of letters that are in Nguyễn. Also forget the last T also. 'new gen'. Soft 'g'.

    That should take some time for the Americans to figure out, that we can't really speak Vietnamese. Never let them know how it is really pronounced. Because none of us know to say that name.


    Make sure that you mention the very satisfying body count of the Communist Horde, inflicted by our boys. As a matter of fact, multiply whatever you are told by 10.

    Stress the areas that the Americans have conquered, but don't mention anything about how those guys like to live underground in tunnels. The Americans above ground are the winners, not the subterranean mole people.

    Absolutely get some pics of Americans giving immunizations at the village or hamlet level. Do NOT report that that is a pretty sure way of having those cute little adorable children's arms being cut off by the Bad Boys, after the medics or the corpsmen have left those villages.

    Also, use the names or the acronyms for the Commies. Use Viet Minh (VM), North VietNam Army (NVA), and Viet Cong (VC), interchangeably, to keep the Americans confused. Also, stress how the words Charly and Gook are used by everybody, including by the Commies, themselves.

    You are to emphasize the word Trail, when you are writing about the Ho Chi Minh Trail, even though now it is the size of a Freeway.

    Feel free to include pics of soldiers holding puppies. Americans LOVE puppies!

    And some pics with tattoos of Mom. Mothers really adore those tats.

    Try to spread the word that Buddhist monks are being attacked by the Charlys. They set each one that they capture on fire. Repeat this, just as is being done below:


    Emphasize how as to SVN General Nguyễn Ngọc Loan is actually shooting a Lice Killing Round into the hair of Captain Nguyễn Lem of the VC, to make sure that the nits of the Captain are not spread about the luxurious prison camp where he is being held.

    head shot.jpghead shot.jpg

    Rinse and repeat.

    And would it be so hard to find a place to paint a Happy Face onto the entrance gate of an American armed forces compound?'*

    *actual text on 'How to Keep the USA Happy', as found one day by reporter Walter Cronkite.

    Last edited by UncaRastus; 10-01-2015 at 10:56 PM.

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