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    Checking Out the Gym Hotties

    Ok, I'm a retired officer who likes to check out the hot female Airmen at the gym. Does this make me a "creepy old man," or just an older dude who appreciates the finer things in life?

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    Senior Member Absinthe Anecdote's Avatar
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    Re: Checking Out the Gym Hotties

    If you are caught gawking directly or even by using the mirrors, yes, it makes you a creepy old man.

    I always try to use a "three-point reflection" when using the gym mirrors. Most girls are aware of direct and two-point reflection tactics.

    Try using some type of stretching motion when initiating a gaze, their attention is diverted from your eyes long enough for you to complete a three second gaze.

    Anything over three seconds is considered staring and over five seconds it becomes gawking.

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    Re: Checking Out the Gym Hotties

    Quote Originally Posted by Absinthe Anecdote View Post
    If you are caught gawking directly or even by using the mirrors, yes, it makes you a creepy old man.

    I always try to use a "three-point reflection" when using the gym mirrors. Most girls are aware of direct and two-point reflection tactics.

    Try using some type of stretching motion when initiating a gaze, their attention is diverted from your eyes long enough for you to complete a three second gaze.

    Anything over three seconds is considered staring and over five seconds it becomes gawking.
    How about mirrored sunglasses as I'm flexing my varicose veins in front of the mirror next to the hottie? That's got to be good for at least 5 minutes of direct eye-raping before the sight of me makes her nausea unbearable.

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    Senior Member Absinthe Anecdote's Avatar
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    Re: Checking Out the Gym Hotties

    Quote Originally Posted by FLAPS, USAF (ret) View Post
    How about mirrored sunglasses as I'm flexing my varicose veins in front of the mirror next to the hottie? That's got to be good for at least 5 minutes of direct eye-raping before the sight of me makes her nausea unbearable.
    If you are really that far gone, you might be better of feigning that you are recovering from a stroke and just give yourself a cute speech impediment and start chatting them up. You've got to be able to pull off "cute and harmless" or it won't work.

    Watch that Seth McFarland movie, Ted, to get an idea of the persona that you want to project. It is an unusual cross between Peter Griffin and one of the Care Bears.

    You won't have the visual image of an adorable teddy bear, but you can create the same effect with your attitude if you practice.

    You'll have them spotting for you and helping you with you workout if you play your cards right.

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    Senior Member Greg's Avatar
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    Re: Checking Out the Gym Hotties

    Wear some fleece sweats, with Chuck Taylors. Ask for a demonstration on the pec-deck. Don't forget a terrycloth headband.

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    Senior Member Gonzo432's Avatar
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    Re: Checking Out the Gym Hotties

    Quote Originally Posted by Greg View Post
    Wear some fleece sweats, with Chuck Taylors. Ask for a demonstration on the pec-deck. Don't forget a terrycloth headband.
    A circa-78 Dr. J jersey would go well with this look.
    "Wrong" is one of those concepts that requires witnesses. Catbert, Evil Director of Human Resources

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    Senior Member 71Fish's Avatar
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    Re: Checking Out the Gym Hotties

    Quote Originally Posted by Absinthe Anecdote View Post
    If you are caught gawking directly or even by using the mirrors, yes, it makes you a creepy old man.

    I always try to use a "three-point reflection" when using the gym mirrors. Most girls are aware of direct and two-point reflection tactics.

    Try using some type of stretching motion when initiating a gaze, their attention is diverted from your eyes long enough for you to complete a three second gaze.

    Anything over three seconds is considered staring and over five seconds it becomes gawking.
    Simply knowing that trick makes you a creepy old man. I've never heard of doing that (thanks for the tip).

    Use your peripherals.

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    Re: Checking Out the Gym Hotties

    If you are wearing those tight black pants and I can see your labia, then yes you will get stared at.

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    Re: Checking Out the Gym Hotties

    Quote Originally Posted by FLAPS, USAF (ret) View Post
    Ok, I'm a retired officer who likes to check out the hot female Airmen at the gym. Does this make me a "creepy old man," or just an older dude who appreciates the finer things in life?
    Can't wait 'til the day I can go from the "creepy old man" to the much beloved "dirty old man", you know the old guy who can slap young chicks on the ass and they thinks it's funny...I wonder when you go from one to the other.

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    Re: Checking Out the Gym Hotties

    Quote Originally Posted by sandsjames View Post
    Can't wait 'til the day I can go from the "creepy old man" to the much beloved "dirty old man", you know the old guy who can slap young chicks on the ass and they thinks it's funny...I wonder when you go from one to the other.
    I'll try that next week and let you know if 45 is that magic number. Wish me luck!

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