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Thread: Marriage in the military

  1. #51
    Newbie - (Restricted)
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    Jun 2013
    Okinawa, Japan
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    Re: Marriage in the military

    In my experience, American women arent witholding sex because of a forgotten gift or lack of material things, they are witholding the sex because you forgot the anniversary/birthday/special occasion that the woman has held near-and-dear to her heart. Women in America use the sex-holdout tactic because that is one avenue for them that is very effective! Most guys, when faced with the prospect of no-sex for a long time after getting sex regularly will cave or try to make amends, usually with a token gift. But it doesnt always and shouldnt always be with a purchased item. Sometimes the best tokens of love cant be bought.

    But then again, what do I know? Im only the gay friend for about 5 married spouses who hears the back end of the conversations from these women when discussing their marriages.

  2. #52

    Re: Marriage in the military

    Quote Originally Posted by zeke7142003 View Post
    I had a friend get married to get out of the dorms (overseas). He married a bar girl from the didn't last. You can take the girl out of the bar, but you will have a hard time taking the bar out of the girl.
    He used her to get out of the dorms, she used him to get that US citizenship.

  3. #53

    Re: Marriage in the military

    Quote Originally Posted by jshiver15 View Post
    I used to be surprised by divorces in the Air Force, but now it is just common-place. I have friends who bring up talks about divorce before their first anniversary. I always tell them the same thing: the first couple of years will be the most trying. My wife and I have been together since 2002, I enlisted in 2006, and we married in 2007. Even with us being together for 5 years, the first year was pretty turbulent. It was a whole new way of life for the both of us. We were both home sick. I wasn't used to being in the Air Force yet. And shift work took its toll. But we stuck it out! We took our oath (to each other) seriously. I think there are way too many people, especially from my generation, that have no goddamn convictions.

    Shit happens, I get it. But I see people resorting to divorce at the drop of a hat. I know several females in the military who have been married at least 3 times. Not to single women out, just my observation. In fact, one girl I was in training with in 2010 had been in the Air Force for less than three years and had to change her name 3 separate times (her ex-husband was actually in the course with us, which made it awkward). But less than a year after that, she had re-married and divorced yet again.
    Even today, a "co-worker" made a comment about how I shouldn't apply my morals to other people. I had to explain, because it wasn't getting through to him, that I think there is a general responsibility to take your vowels seriously. Not for you, but for your partner. I just don't see why this isn't common perception. And in all honesty, it makes me sad.
    There was a female like that in my squadron. She PCS'd in with one name, 6 months later she went by another name, and then a few months later she suckered a guy in our squadron to marry her, so she took his name. So yeah, 3 different names in less than a year. Girl was a mess. I'm sure she's now on her fourth or fifth last name by now.

    Her name change was so constant that no one was ever current on her name. Our shop just referred to her by an amalgamation of all the names she'd used. So Williams, Martin, and Ramos* became Wilmaramos.
    *names changed to protect the idiotic

  4. #54
    Senior Member Rusty Jones's Avatar
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    Oct 2011
    Norfolk, VA
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    Re: Marriage in the military

    Quote Originally Posted by Absinthe Anecdote View Post
    My second lawyer explained it to me in plain but painful terms that I didn’t have a chance in hell of winning primary custody and it didn’t matter who she slept with.

    He said that for a judge in Virginia to take primary custody away from the mother they have to be a criminal or a drug addict.

    I divorced my ex-wife for adultery. I had actually adopted her two daughters. She wasn't present at court, but didn't have to be because it was uncontested and we had a marital settlement agreement.

    Despite that; the judge actually tried to push custody onto me; even though I didn't want it and the marital settlement agreement had her with custody.
    "Well... Uber's going to "driverless" cars soon, and their research probably shows that they're a natural fit (when it comes to getting paid for doing nothing)."
    -Rainmaker, referencing black males

  5. #55
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    Jun 2008
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    Re: Marriage in the military

    I really don't think there is a set reason as to why a marriage lasts in the military or doesn't.

    My husband and I just celebrated our 16th anniversary. We are definately an exception to the rule though. We were married 4 months after our first date and only 2 months after tech school. We were stationed apart almost a year before he PCS'd to my base. We still keep in contact with our friends from our first base and all 5 couples are still married (anywhere from 16-18 years).

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