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Thread: Overheard in the Air Force

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    Senior Member Absinthe Anecdote's Avatar
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    Overheard in the Air Force

    I was thinking we could rip off Overheard in New York and start an Overheard in the Air Force thread.
    Here are a few from the original website to give you an idea of what I’m talking about.

    12PM On the Count of Three, Quote Rankin-Bass
    Config Manager Guy: It’s like the island of misfit toys over there.
    DBA: I don’t want to be in support, I want to be a dentist.
    2202 N. Westshore Boulevard
    Tampa, Florida

    6PM Not Even If It Ends Up Here?

    NYU Professor: Being a visiting professor has its good points: I don’t give a shit what I say!
    19 University Place
    New York, NY
    Posted 2013-06-17

    5PM “Fortunately, I managed to rightsize the baby in time.”

    Supervisor: Trust me. I’ll take care of it.
    Employee: The last time I heard that line I ended up pregnant.
    631 Dickinson Avenue
    Greenville, North Carolina
    Posted 2013-06-17

    4PM “…I mean, rightsize us.”

    Candidate: At my last job, our supervisors drilled it into us that we had to document everything we designed.
    Interviewer: And what was the purpose of documenting your designs?
    Candidate: They were getting ready to fire us.
    47 Mall Drive
    Commack, New York
    Posted 2013-06-17

    3PM Unions: Your Guarantee of Quality

    A maintenance guy hangs up a picture and tells his assistant: That should stay up till it falls down.
    3301 Gun Club Road
    West Palm Beach, Florida

    10PM Take This Job and McShove It

    Manager: You have to keep your collar buttoned unless your undershirt is white. I can see that yours is black.
    Cashier: That’s not how we did it before.
    Manager: That wasn’t this McDonald’s.
    1983 86th Street
    Brooklyn, New York

    4PM When It’s Kill-or-Cure Time

    Coworker to another who’s holding McDonald’s: God, I love the taste of sausage when I’m hung over

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    Senior Member Absinthe Anecdote's Avatar
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    Re: Overheard in the Air Force

    Five Dollars Per Axel
    Gate Guard: Good evening Sir, may I see you military ID card?
    Confused Motorist: How much is the toll?
    Gate Guard: This isn’t a toll booth.

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    Senior Member Absinthe Anecdote's Avatar
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    Re: Overheard in the Air Force

    It’s a little tart for my taste
    SSgt 1: Dude! It’s true the astronauts drink recycled piss during space flights.
    SSgt 2: No man, the astronauts drink Tang!
    SSgt 1: And why do you think it’s called Tang?

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