PDA

View Full Version : Going to college.. Should it be the parents responsibility or the kids?



Capt Alfredo
07-01-2013, 02:20 AM
With colleges these days seeming to get more and more costly, should it fall on the parents to be required to save up to pay for it should they want their little darlings to go, or should it be the kid's requirement to get the money?

I don't know. I'm of two minds; when I was younger my parents weren't going to pay a dime. It was on me to finance my own college education and the best way to do that, according to my dad, was to join the military. I guess that did work out, eventually (it took me two extra years to finish my Bachelor of Arts than it would have had I gone the traditional college route), after incurring some student loan debt and then biting the bullet after my freshman year and joining the Air Force. For my kids, I've transferred each of them 18 months of the GI Bill benefit, so that should cover about half of their college each. On the one hand, I would want my kids to enjoy the full college experience, but on the other, you don't always appreciate things when they're handed to you. Perhaps they could do ROTC. //troll mode// Under no circumstances would I encourage them to enlist in the military //troll mode//

garhkal
07-01-2013, 02:25 AM
With colleges these days seeming to get more and more costly, should it fall on the parents to be required to save up to pay for it should they want their little darlings to go, or should it be the kid's requirement to get the money?

USMC0341
07-01-2013, 02:36 AM
I think it should be the kids. I would help with incidentals and other small expenses, but I believe they would value the education more if they were the ones footing the bill.

Mr. Squid
07-01-2013, 03:06 AM
I don't know. I'm of two minds; when I was younger my parents weren't going to pay a dime. It was on me to finance my own college education and the best way to do that, according to my dad, was to join the military. I guess that did work out, eventually (it took me two extra years to finish my Bachelor of Arts than it would have had I gone the traditional college route), after incurring some student loan debt and then biting the bullet after my freshman year and joining the Air Force. For my kids, I've transferred each of them 18 months of the GI Bill benefit, so that should cover about half of their college each. On the one hand, I would want my kids to enjoy the full college experience, but on the other, you don't always appreciate things when they're handed to you. Perhaps they could do ROTC. //troll mode// Under no circumstances would I encourage them to enlist in the military //troll mode//If for whatever reason they're not selected for ROTC, and let's face it, not everyone who wants that scholarship can get it, what other options would you encourage to pay off that second half? Working is always an option, but enlisting for another GI bill really isn't a bad idea.

Greg
07-01-2013, 03:37 AM
Go to college while mom and pop foot the bill. Play some ball, drink beer, and chase hotties. Drop out after a couple of years.

Enlist in the Coast Guard, and become a Boatswain's Mate. Run small boats, such as search and rescue, and bouy tending. Separate after initial enlistment.

Apply for, and obtain, a Charter boat captain's license. Move to Florida, and use a VA loan to buy a Hatterus Sportfisherman, about forty-some foot.

Maintain a dock in the Florida Keys, while cruising through the Panama Canal to fish for big bill-fish off the west coast of Central America.

While docked, back at the Keys, have a couple of blondes, in bikinis, scrubbing the Hatterus' decks while sitting around, drinking beer!

Send mom and dad "wish you were here" cards, post stamped from the Keys.

CYBERFX1024
07-01-2013, 03:39 AM
I don't know. I'm of two minds; when I was younger my parents weren't going to pay a dime. It was on me to finance my own college education and the best way to do that, according to my dad, was to join the military. I guess that did work out, eventually (it took me two extra years to finish my Bachelor of Arts than it would have had I gone the traditional college route), after incurring some student loan debt and then biting the bullet after my freshman year and joining the Air Force. For my kids, I've transferred each of them 18 months of the GI Bill benefit, so that should cover about half of their college each. On the one hand, I would want my kids to enjoy the full college experience, but on the other, you don't always appreciate things when they're handed to you. Perhaps they could do ROTC. //troll mode// Under no circumstances would I encourage them to enlist in the military //troll mode//

My parents laid it out for me early on in high school "We don't have the money to put you in college, so you have to enlist or pay for it yourself." So I went ahead and joined up.

garhkal
07-01-2013, 04:12 AM
If for whatever reason they're not selected for ROTC, and let's face it, not everyone who wants that scholarship can get it, what other options would you encourage to pay off that second half? Working is always an option, but enlisting for another GI bill really isn't a bad idea.

Yup.. They could sign up for 3 years and get the GI bill's benefits. OR go in for 4 years and get as much of their college done as possible while IN using Tuition assistance.

MajesticThunder
07-01-2013, 05:41 AM
Go to college while mom and pop foot the bill. Play some ball, drink beer, and chase hotties. Drop out after a couple of years.

Enlist in the Coast Guard, and become a Boatswain's Mate. Run small boats, such as search and rescue, and bouy tending. Separate after initial enlistment.

Apply for, and obtain, a Charter boat captain's license. Move to Florida, and use a VA loan to buy a Hatterus Sportfisherman, about forty-some foot.

Maintain a dock in the Florida Keys, while cruising through the Panama Canal to fish for big bill-fish off the west coast of Central America.

While docked, back at the Keys, have a couple of blondes, in bikinis, scrubbing the Hatterus' decks while sitting around, drinking beer!

Send mom and dad "wish you were here" cards, post stamped from the Keys.

http://www.demotivationalposters.org/image/demotivational-poster/0808/catch-of-the-day-girl-bikini-boat-fish-demotivational-poster-1219410593.jpg

+1. A great word picture for a nearly perfect after military career or “working” retirement. Thanks! :thumb

RS6405
07-01-2013, 11:19 AM
Here is a flipside perspective....Growing up, my Dad alway drilled into us kids that we all going to college. He served from 61-81 and had a hard time finishing his associates. The AF did not have the same programs or focus on education as it has today.

My parents always intended to help pay for it; they lucked out with my brother getting a full scholarship to play football. My sister went to LSU. I had Tulane recruiting me, but I was practical enough to know my parents could not afford that kind of tuition. So I opted for smaller state college where the tuition was around $1,600 a semester plus fees.

My parents paid the college tuition for just 4 years while my sister and I worked to cover our living expenses. I chose to get a two degrees, which took longer hence I took out student loans for the time past 4 years.

Shortly after I graduated, Louisiana came out with the TOPS program, which would covered the basic tuition of all LA high school graduates with a reasonable (2.0-2.5?) GPA attending a state ran college/ university. Just my luck lol.

********

Divorces decrees in several states can now address/ order parents to help with college or post high school educational expenses.

I am not sure how it is considered by the Courts in all states, but in some states, it is based on the pre-divorce/ separation expectation that the children would go to college or such an education is part of the family standard. Other states may have a different basis for ordering parents to help pay for such expenses, so check with an attorney in your area.

Calmo70
07-01-2013, 01:31 PM
For me - I got/paid for both of my kids thru undergraduate (BS degrees). After that - they are on their own. Son has a degree in journalism - was a newspaper reporter for about five years. Decided he felt a "calling" and is currently in seminary working on a Masters in Theology. Daughter has undergraduate in IT and is working as an IT/LAN Manager for a bank. Just this past weekend - informed us she has decided to go back for a Masters in Elementary Education. Has decided she wants to teach elementary school. Either way - both are/will be paying for the post graduate stuff.

20+Years
07-01-2013, 01:52 PM
To me, I think it depends on the child also. I tried my hardest to get my oldest son to buckle down in highschool. He just wouldn't do it. Ended up dropping out his senior year. Fast forward, he is about to be 21 and wants to start college this fall. Should I be required to pay for it? Am I? Nope. To me, its just not a good investment. Through a miracle he has pulled a scholarship (yes, as a dropout), the rest he will have to do with working/student loans. What he doesn't know, is if he turns his life around and sees this through, I will most likely pay his student loans off upon graduation.

My daughter on the other hand has tried her hardest in HS, although not always straight A's, she puts in the effort. I have transferred my remaining GI to her.

So should we have to pay for college as parents, I would say No. I can guess what our Pres would say though.

DocBones
07-01-2013, 01:52 PM
Greg,

You came very close to explaining my life, posting as you did in here! OK, so that was my dream of life, anyhow. Except that in my dreams, I had a full crew of good looking female Marines/Sailorettes crewing the boat, wearing tiny bikinis made out of the Marine Corps/Navies camo uniform material, and the boat also had many Ma Deuces, 81mm mortars, a Phalanx system, some cruise missiles, and a refurbished 16 inch gun on deck, for just in case we had to 'calm down' the people on or near the beaches that we wanted to land on.

Oh, yeah, I almost forgot, but to keep within the guideline of staying on subject, that Great Britain still owes us, as well as France, for finally joining the WW2 effort to spank Hirohito and Hitler, not to mention Mussolini, that them there subjects/citizens of GB and France should pay for the college/university stuff, for any/all of the veterans from hereon in, for the vets to get their degrees.

Yeah, that's the ticket!

Bumble78
07-01-2013, 02:43 PM
I have told my kids that it is on them if they want to go to college. If they can live at home when they go, we will let them but they will either be in school or they will move out after graduation.

Rusty Jones
07-01-2013, 02:56 PM
It's really not up to us to decide who should foot the bill. Whether or not the parents want to do it; it's on them.

Concerning government and government-backed student loans; the government needs to be more selective in giving them out. For example, why is the government giving loans for students to go to University of Phoenix, DeVry, Everest, ITT, etc? The degrees from these schools, and other for-profits just like them, are completely worthless and any resume with the degrees from these schools listed on them are filtered out by most private sector employers.

And tuition for for-profit schools is many times higher than those for public and private not-for-profit schools.

And people with degrees from these schools will have no way to pay these loans back.

Even if you go to a decent school; the major should be taken into consideration - what does a job requiring this degree pay, and how high is the demand for people with this degree?

Bottom line: what is the likelihood that the money will actually be paid back? That needs to be taken into consideration before loans are paid out.

Measure Man
07-01-2013, 03:47 PM
I've had college loan accounts for my kids...not enough to completely pay for all their college, but enough to take the hurt out of it a little.

My oldest chose a different path, so I used some of that money on her wedding...don't remember what happened to the rest.

My youngest will be a Freshman this fall...so, I transferred my remaining 27 months of the GI Bill, which should get her close to 3 years done...plus she got some good scholarships...and her college account will be used for incidentals and hopefully have enough to get her through her senior year.

It makes me happy to be able to send her to college and she'll be able to start out in life without college loans to pay off...or course, she's already thinking graduate school or law school, but that will be on her.

Pullinteeth
07-01-2013, 03:54 PM
If I can afford it, I would like to help out at least some. If I can't, sucks to be them. I got my help from the military so can they...

Pullinteeth
07-01-2013, 04:42 PM
Never fear, Congressional Democrats doubled the student load interest rates overnight merely by doing nothing....the one thing both Congressional Democrats and Congressional Republicans are good at doing....

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2013/07/01/student-loan-rates-double-as-calendar-turns-to-july/

garhkal
07-01-2013, 08:49 PM
Divorces decrees in several states can now address/ order parents to help with college or post high school educational expenses.

I am not sure how it is considered by the Courts in all states, but in some states, it is based on the pre-divorce/ separation expectation that the children would go to college or such an education is part of the family standard. Other states may have a different basis for ordering parents to help pay for such expenses, so check with an attorney in your area.

At least its not as bad as France. I have heard numerous times that according to their country law's, as a parent you are REQUIRED to pay all the college fee's you kid(s) rack up, even if they do nothing but stay in college for 10+ years...


To me, I think it depends on the child also. I tried my hardest to get my oldest son to buckle down in highschool. He just wouldn't do it. Ended up dropping out his senior year. Fast forward, he is about to be 21 and wants to start college this fall. Should I be required to pay for it? Am I? Nope. To me, its just not a good investment. Through a miracle he has pulled a scholarship (yes, as a dropout), the rest he will have to do with working/student loans. What he doesn't know, is if he turns his life around and sees this through, I will most likely pay his student loans off upon graduation.

My daughter on the other hand has tried her hardest in HS, although not always straight A's, she puts in the effort. I have transferred my remaining GI to her.

So should we have to pay for college as parents, I would say No. I can guess what our Pres would say though.

Kinder than i would be for your eldest.


It's really not up to us to decide who should foot the bill. Whether or not the parents want to do it; it's on them.

Concerning government and government-backed student loans; the government needs to be more selective in giving them out. For example, why is the government giving loans for students to go to University of Phoenix, DeVry, Everest, ITT, etc? The degrees from these schools, and other for-profits just like them, are completely worthless and any resume with the degrees from these schools listed on them are filtered out by most private sector employers.

And tuition for for-profit schools is many times higher than those for public and private not-for-profit schools.

And people with degrees from these schools will have no way to pay these loans back.

Even if you go to a decent school; the major should be taken into consideration - what does a job requiring this degree pay, and how high is the demand for people with this degree?

Bottom line: what is the likelihood that the money will actually be paid back? That needs to be taken into consideration before loans are paid out.

I'd also include illegals/foreign students into that mix of being required to be selective etc.. BUt otherwise i fully agree with your posting.

Measure Man
07-01-2013, 08:58 PM
I've had college loan accounts for my kids...not enough to completely pay for all their college, but enough to take the hurt out of it a little.

My oldest chose a different path, so I used some of that money on her wedding...don't remember what happened to the rest.

My youngest will be a Freshman this fall...so, I transferred my remaining 27 months of the GI Bill, which should get her close to 3 years done...plus she got some good scholarships...and her college account will be used for incidentals and hopefully have enough to get her through her senior year.

It makes me happy to be able to send her to college and she'll be able to start out in life without college loans to pay off...or course, she's already thinking graduate school or law school, but that will be on her.

I meant college SAVINGS accounts, not loan accounts...:llama

Capt Alfredo
07-01-2013, 11:38 PM
If for whatever reason they're not selected for ROTC, and let's face it, not everyone who wants that scholarship can get it, what other options would you encourage to pay off that second half? Working is always an option, but enlisting for another GI bill really isn't a bad idea.

Honestly, pretty sure the in-laws would pay. If not, I'm sure at minimum my oldest will get plenty of scholarship offers. There are ways to minimize your university costs if you play your cards right. Enlisting, while good enough for me, wouldn't be something I would encourage my kids to do.

Pullinteeth
07-02-2013, 08:55 PM
At least its not as bad as France. I have heard numerous times that according to their country law's, as a parent you are REQUIRED to pay all the college fee's you kid(s) rack up, even if they do nothing but stay in college for 10+ years...

I'm not sure how true that is but even if it is.....Big friggin deal. Their tuition fees are what? 150-700 euros a year....again...Big friggin deal...

garhkal
07-02-2013, 10:08 PM
Big deal?? So you think its ok for a kid to decide to go to college, get 2+ degrees and mom/dad are REQUIRED to pony up the funds period.. the kid is not required to do squat?

raider8169
07-03-2013, 04:19 AM
I have 3 kids. I will not be able to afford college for all to them. My solution is that the first child that I feel will make use of college will get my GI bill. The rest will have to go for a free ride of have to take out the loans. I will help out however I can but there is only so much I will be able to afford.

Banned
07-03-2013, 04:48 AM
Never fear, Congressional Democrats doubled the student load interest rates overnight merely by doing nothing....the one thing both Congressional Democrats and Congressional Republicans are good at doing....

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2013/07/01/student-loan-rates-double-as-calendar-turns-to-july/

Because of Benghazi no doubt....

TJMAC77SP
07-03-2013, 12:25 PM
Because of Benghazi no doubt....

IT'S BUSH'S FAULT !!

Pullinteeth
07-03-2013, 01:44 PM
Big deal?? So you think its ok for a kid to decide to go to college, get 2+ degrees and mom/dad are REQUIRED to pony up the funds period.. the kid is not required to do squat?

If you could get your kids a college education for $300-1,400 a year you wouldn't foot the bill? Do you have ANYTHING that backs your claim that this is even true?

Banned
07-03-2013, 05:33 PM
I'm going to school again this upcoming semester. I remember when I was going to school last year, trying to figure out where the fuck all my tuition was going. It is interesting that the "free market" produces indordinately expensive education, while the "commies" in Europe produce cheap education.

Mcjohn1118
07-03-2013, 06:35 PM
I have my degree and don't see me investing in a Masters, so my GI Bill is transferred to my kids. However, I always tell them that if/when they go to college, they will have to work for it. Let's face it, I am still investing for my retirement. There will always be grants and loans for education but there is no bank in the world that will loan you money for retirement.

garhkal
07-03-2013, 08:04 PM
If you could get your kids a college education for $300-1,400 a year you wouldn't foot the bill?

I might. But i was also raised that if a kid wants something badly, they should work to earn it, not just assume dad/mom will foot the bill for them.


Do you have ANYTHING that backs your claim that this is even true?

Nope. As i said in the first post on page 3, i have HEARD numerous times that it is that way, that the parents are required to pay ALL the tuition regardless. Trying to use bing/google/yahoo search gets me all sorts of stuff for STATESIDE tuition issues, even when stipulating FRENCH laws in the search engine.. So no i have not been able to find anything to back it up.

Juggs
07-03-2013, 08:10 PM
I went to one year of school and screwed up then enlisted. My parents had to foot the bill for me to play football, and rugby while doing volunteering firefighting. Really not much room for school. I didnt want to go in the first place, my mom talked me into it. I wasnt ready to on my own like that. Could I have lived on my own? Yes. Could I have gone to school and studied on my own at that point? No. Now if I had to pay for it maybe I would've been more responsible. I dont know. I know, i hosed my parents though. Good thing it was only 11k for the year.

Banned
07-03-2013, 08:14 PM
I went to one year of school and screwed up then enlisted. My parents had to foot the bill for me to play football, and rugby while doing volunteering firefighting. Really not much room for school. I didnt want to go in the first place, my mom talked me into it. I wasnt ready to on my own like that. Could I have lived on my own? Yes. Could I have gone to school and studied on my own at that point? No. Now if I had to pay for it maybe I would've been more responsible. I dont know. I know, i hosed my parents though. Good thing it was only 11k for the year.

I hear you - If I hadn't joined the military, I'd probably be a little bitch with zero life experience, no meaningful work experience, no degree, and hosed with student loans. The military, even with all the bullshit, was a huge positive influence on me.

Pullinteeth
07-08-2013, 03:39 PM
Nope. As i said in the first post on page 3, i have HEARD numerous times that it is that way, that the parents are required to pay ALL the tuition regardless. Trying to use bing/google/yahoo search gets me all sorts of stuff for STATESIDE tuition issues, even when stipulating FRENCH laws in the search engine.. So no i have not been able to find anything to back it up.

Here you go....French Website talking about costs and STUDENT loans...if parents have to pay for everything, they wouldn't need student loans would they? Methinks this was just an urban legend...

http://www.french-property.com/guides/france/public-services/higher-education/fees/

garhkal
07-08-2013, 08:40 PM
That it may have been, but with the large # of french people i spoke to who mentioned it, it did make me wonder.

Pullinteeth
07-17-2013, 02:36 PM
This is an interesting article. I don't think it is something that could ever happen and am not sure it should ever happen but it is an interesting perspective that draws attention to the fact that school systems are being burdened with meeting needs that are parental responsibilities with no additional funding to provide those services which then requires cuts into programs that the schools SHOULD be providing like....oh I don't know...classes?

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2013/07/17/utah-legislator-calls-for-end-to-compulsory-education/?test=latestnews

Greg
07-17-2013, 03:39 PM
This is an interesting article. I don't think it is something that could ever happen and am not sure it should ever happen but it is an interesting perspective that draws attention to the fact that school systems are being burdened with meeting needs that are parental responsibilities with no additional funding to provide those services which then requires cuts into programs that the schools SHOULD be providing like....oh I don't know...classes?

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2013/07/17/utah-legislator-calls-for-end-to-compulsory-education/?test=latestnews

"'We live in a society where some children require help beyond the ability of their parents,' Castle said. 'Those students don't deserve to be punished, they don't deserve to be disqualified.'

She said because of compulsory education, teachers and educators are typically the first to see evidence of trouble at home, from abuse to malnourishment. Without the requirement to attend school, or if nonacademic services were removed from the public education system, it would be necessary for the state to create some other form of publicly funded service to fill that role, Castle said."

I propose that after numerous attempts to correct offending, non-compliant parents, the irresponsible parent is to be marched out back, and executed. Then, turn to the witnessing child, "Don't let this be you!"